Ever Wonder Week #4

[Jennifer Grant]

I want to start by giving a BIG shout out and kudo's to everyone for stretching themselves out of their comfort zone and posting such intimate comments with this group! I'm sure you've noticed it has effected you more than you thought it would...expressing yourself or your thoughts and feelings through writing is sooo meaningful and therapeutic!!!

Ok...so here is the question for this week:

"Do you ever let yesterday fill up too much of today?"

[Jennifer Grant]

Amen to that! Without getting into too much detail, KarenHays and I have both been supporting each other the past few weeks to do just that Roseann! Good for you girl!

[Sandy Clements]

How can we not let yesterday fill up our today - since it's all the little things that happened in yesterdays that make us who we are. The bad experiences make us tougher and the good ones keep us going. I've had a lot of bad things happen to me physically - I was a passenger in a bad car accident (near head on) 10 years ago I've endured several surgeries and painful procedures and still live in constant chronic pain. Because of it I've lost my successful career and many important moments of family time.

You can't help but ask "Why" and "Why Me." Well I guess what I've found out over the past ten years it that everyone has a skeleton in there closet that haunts them. Some of us have scarier ones than others but we all have challenges that we have to overcome. For me it's getting beyond the pain and learning to lead a normal life which on some days, especially lately, it can be difficult.

So I guess my answer to the question is - why not let yesterday fill up today because we can't change it! It's how we deal with it that makes us who we are. If I could go back in time would I change anything? Would I have said to my husband "Lets stay home for lunch today and not get in our van today." No. Because there are so many good experiences that go with the bad. God never hands us anything that we can't handle.

By the way - thanks Jen for this one - I needed an outlet today!!

[Jennifer Grant]

My pleasure sister--:0) {{hugs}} to ya!

[Sara]

Wonderful question...and my answer would be a giant yes! Personally I think this is one of my greatest challenges. I catch myself (everyday) endlessly ruminating over past experiences, things I've said (or didn't say), and choices I've made. One of my biggest goals is to "live in the moment." I try to make time to pursue things that automatically put me in the moment - things like painting, drumming, and being in nature (hard to do in nyc!) LOL
I have no idea why it's so difficult for almost all of us to relax into the moment...it's so much of losing control over us!more natural and liberating when we do.
This question definitely made me think of a few books though by Eckhart Tolle...The Power of Now (which I def. recommend if you haven't read it!) and his newest book - A New Earth. In A New Earth Tolle includes a story about two zen monks that I love - I've copied it below:

"The inability or rather unwillingness of the human mind to let go of the past is beautifully illustrated in the story of two Zen monks, Tanzan and Ekido, who were walking along a country road that had become extremely muddy after heavy rains. Near a village, they came upon a young woman who was trying to cross the road, but the mud was so deep it would have ruined the silk kimono she was wearing. Tanzan at once picked her up and carried her to the other side

The monks walked on in silence. Five hours later, as they were approaching the lodging temple, Ekido couldn't restrain himself any longer. "Why did you carry that girl across the road?" he asked. "We monks are not supposed to do things like that?"

"I put the girl down hours ago," said Tanzan. "Are you still carrying her?"

[Tammy]

I constantly let yesterday fill up my today's and if I'm not doing that, then it is the worrying about tomorrows that fills up the rest. I am aware that I do this, and it is a constant effort for me not to do this, and just live in the here and now. I am a worrier by nature, my head is always spinning with I should have's or what if's. I don't like to offend people or have confrontations (though I do confront if I have to), and I like things planned out (but then worry if the plans are right or if it will work out the way I want) just a big circle as you can see. My husband is a good balance for me.

I wish I new how to let go of things, ways that people have hurt me, judgmental thoughts and feelings. These questions are so good for me. Having suffered with chronic depression, lately I think I've just given up and lost hope. I've stopped creating everyday, I don't mean just art and such, but creating joy, creating my own happiness, creating a reason to be joyful and caring about all around me. This is something I want to fix, and having a place like this is motivating and inspiring to me. So thank you for that.